There's an ANGEL looking after me!

Thoughts flow through my mind, my heart, like magic! I am often told that I should be documenting these thoughts but time seems to slip away. I have wondered what the blogger world would be like for my 'down-to-earth, no-frills' self. I have decided to find out and so, here I am!

As I type my first entry, I have a heavy heart. Today marks the 17th anniversary of the death of an amazing person. Suzette Melanie Ryan was born October 31st, 1975 and 16 short years later, was tragically taken from this earth. January 11th, 1992. I know exactly where I was and when...although my reaction to the news seems to be a blur. I've since heard people refer to 9/11 like that. The day that shook the entire world is how 1/11 shook the world for those who knew Suzette. The next day was my birthday...I don't think anybody said "Happy Birthday" and if they did, it was for formality only - I don't remember. I do recall the phone ringing often and flight plans being made...wow!

Seventeen years later and once in awhile it'll hit me and I feel that 'hard to breathe' feeling again. I turned 15 the next day and as the years went on I always dreaded the age of 30. For most, 30 is naturally the age to dread (as is 40, 50 and so on) but for me, it held a little more. I knew that 30 meant that Suzette would be gone from this earth for as long as she was here...that was a tough piece for me to swallow, still is! I am comforted with knowing that although 17 years have passed, I can still remember so much of the little time we did spend together. Music videos made by Paula and Suzanne to the tune of Belinda Carlisle's song titled, "I Feel the Magic" (fully rehearsed with Bibles held overhead as the lyrics, "there's an angel looking after me" played) and Suzette and I singing Bon Jovi's hit, "Livin' on a Prayer" into curling irons acting as mics. Even the titles of those songs leave something to ponder.

I believe Suzette is here in our hearts - she is much too amazing to leave. Suzette has recently been joined by other angels dear to me. As time goes on, I will share more. I know I need to feel those thoughts, like "I Feel the Magic!"